Uglifruit: Presents.

 

Lyrics and album notes.  

 

01 – My Prayer.

02 – Falling Down Again.

03 – Meteorites.

04 – Machiavellian Ways.

05 – Officer’s Mess (March).

06 – Lullaby.

07 – What’s ‘Round Here? (A Mystery).

08 – Feeling Confuzzzed.

09 – Carry On Crying.

10 – Strictly Rehearsed.

11 – Eventually (Pop Song).

12 – Goodbye From The Okay Chorale.

 

Go here to download the full album.


 

01 – My Prayer.


02 – Falling Down Again.
The note that I read said we're drifting apart
But I can barely believe the things that I read theses days
The lines that I read said you'd dearly depart
Which I barely believe
Do you really rarely miss me?

Could I stitch up the patchwork pieces
Smooth over creases
And seize a reprise please

Before we fall down
Before we fall down
(Falling down again)
Relax fall back and I'll catch you.

Words overheard stir an ache in my heart
My pulse race begins with a pistol whipped startc
There's a red sticky trickle seeps from my ear
I can barely believe
Do you really rarely miss me?

Could I stitch up the patchwork pieces
Smooth over creases
And seize a reprise
Should I pick over painful pieces
Dress our diseases
As the pressure increase
To an end to this siege please

Before we fall down
Before we fall down
(Falling down again)
Relax fall back and I'll catch you


03 – Meteorites.
Show me you're the one
Or tell me I'm wrong
Just kiss me or kill me
If I know what you need to breathe
I'll be beneath you
Please let me relieve you
Although I know your glow has gone
You shone like a star to me
Above everyone

Fall from the sky
I can't meet your eyes with mine tonight
Fall from the sky
Meteorites
Too hot to look upon

Show me I've a chance
Or tell I've none
And dance 'til you kill me
If what you need is mine to shine
I'll stand beside you
If you let me provide you
With what I have to give
You live like a star to me
Above everyone

Fall from the sky
I can't meet your eyes with mine tonight
Fall from the sky
As meteorites
Too hot to look upon

Show me you're the one

Tell me I'm wrong

If I know what you need to breathe

Fall from the sky
I can't meet your eyes with mine tonight
Fall from the sky
Too hot to look upon


04 – Machiavellian Ways.
You've been taking sweets from strangers
Why don't you stay out of danger
These things'll prematurely age you
We've been hurtling 'round in circles
But we blame Winston Churchill (never!)
If we're fighting like ninja turtles
You've be slipping backwards moonwalking
Cyberstalking
Please pop the cork in and walk away

Does my machismo keep us together in this snowy weather
And is that why you're so cold, please
I've misgivings about masochism
But it keeps me on my toes and my knees
So I'll stay
Throughout your Machiavellian ways

I resent the act we're caught in
My understudies you've brought in
An out-take by Joe Orton
And Halliwell as well
Your Chinese water torture (drip drip drip)
Fortunately ought to do my trick
If we were granted just three wishes
You'd want untold riches
In-laws to sleep with the fishes
While I do the dishes

Does my machismo keep us together in this snowy weather
And is that why you're so cold, please
And your mucho machinations
Keeps me on my toes and my knees
So I'll stay
Throughout your Machiavellian ways

Your many Machiavellian ways
Throughout those Machiavellian ways
Your many Machiavellian ways
Throughout those Machiavellian ways
Your mucho macho ways
Your mucho Machiavellian ways


05 – Officer’s Mess (March).
Close those eyes
And temper your breathing
As this subsides
Remember I'm leaving tonight
Put on your clothes your suit smile and make up
When I awake salute and I'll march.

Professors and philosophers could not assess the stress
Of twice a week cleaning from sheets
My officer's mess

March!


06 – Lullaby.
Asleep at the wheel
Leaving the motorway
Dreaming of you
Breaking too hard they say
Out of control
A kaleidoscope
Oh I do like to be beside your bedside and hope
Squeezing your hand
Hoping you recognize
Can you hear me?
I think that you can hear me – or very nearly
Oh everyone sends there regards
But I wish that there cards were celebratory cards
 
07 – What’s ‘Round Here? (A Mystery).
Tumbleweed blows – no-one's home
The streets are empty now
Deserted - yet somewhere hear a car alarm sound
Where are the children
Are they playing or are you saying....

Shops are boarded no-one cared
To turn the 'open' sign around
Departed - but didn't leave a note to say
Where are the children
Are they hiding
Frightened of...

What's 'round here?
Tell me please
What's 'round here?
Show me – show me what is going on - with adequate explanation
To fear...
Tell me there's nothing to fear when you're here

A public phone without a dialling tone
But who's there to call at all
Ignored, the traffic lights changed unconcerned
Red – Green -Amber
And no children seen, nor heard
And the words I remember before I slept
We're a nurse in uniform saying “This might hurt a bit”.

What's 'round here?
Tell me please
What's 'round here?
What's going on?
What's going on?
I don't understand it
So explain it to me - in plain English thoroughly
(To fear...)
Tell me there's nothing to fear when you're here
Please


08 – Feeling Confuzzzed.
Trapped between oceans lie the dry lands
Where no-one goes in, ‘cos no-one can swim
And far from those oceans lives a shy man
But you can't persuade him to ever jump in
Cos he's scared that he'll drown
Look a clown
With his Alka-Seltzer pants pulled down
I'm afraid his greasepaint just ain't waterproof

So dreaming of oceans lives the dry man upon land
With rubber rings in truth unused
Or feeling confused
Out of the city stands a country girl
Wishing for nights out in the lights – or here upon steeds
But back in his city, sitting in factory world
He's wondering where he could find better air to breathe

And they both believe
There grass isn't green
And they meet in one another's dreams
The elms on Elms St seem to always bloom

It's seems that they've schemes of leaving their worlds, the boy and the girl
With treasure map in fact unused
 
Or feeling confused

Cos he's scared that he'll drown
Look a clown
With his Alka-Seltzer pants pulled down

It's seems that they've schemes of leaving their worlds, the boy and the girl
With treasure map in fact unused

Or feeling confused


09 – Carry On Crying.
Did he miss your reciprocated kiss in passing
And did you wish he stop exacerbating this – your itch by scratching
It's not healing, your not healing
I can tell by your weeping
You keeping on weeping
Cry, Cry, Cry if you want to, Cry
Cry, Cry, Cry if you want to then cry
Cry.

Carry on crying

And did he claim that he's misunderstood and blames no-one names no-one shames...
Because your implicated anyway
By scratching – you're not learning, you're still hurting
I can tell when you're tearful
Your tears tell a tale to me

Cry, Cry, Cry if you need to, Cry
Cry, Cry, Cry if you have to then cry

Cry, Cry, Cry if you want to, Cry
Cry, Cry, Cry let me join you and I'll - Cry.


10 – Strictly Rehearsed.
Your eyes flick over the room searching for someone
Thinking of something
Assessing the exits
And planning your move
You play people like I play piano
This is your forte
A virtuoso performance
With every movement neatly in it's place
And you lie with impeccable taste
To say that it's made up on the spot
But it's not – it's strictly rehearsed

Your lips are quick with a quip and a kiss for the taking
Am I thinking of making
The biggest mistake my tongues ever made
You play people like I'm playing patience
Dealing then cheating
Waiting for aces
And every hard falls neatly into place
And you lie with impeccable taste
And say that it's made up on the spot
But it's not – it's strictly rehearsed

See how you play
Rules of your own that no-one else knows

Your inscrutable beautiful face hides what you’re feeling
So unrevealing
You could appear in Noh-theatre
Your face is a mask
you play people like I'm playing pac-man
Chasing ghosts more than most just 'cos you can
With every pattern neatly in it's place
And you lie with impeccable taste
Say that it's made up on the spot
But I've realised – it's strictly rehearsed

Strictly rehearsed
From chorus to verse
Nothing is worse
Cos it's slightly perverse
When cursed with
And the bubble has burst


11 – Eventually (Pop Song).
Her hands say to me she'll be coming eventually
Or does she delay (did she laugh)
Then make her own way (after)

I'll be waiting in the morning with my bags by the door for you
And I'll be chasing all the hours I'll be wasting while I wait for you

If her clocks ticking on
Will alarms bells be rung when she's done (ding dong)
Or has wound down (in the bath)
Making her own way (after)

Growing older doing what I'm told I'm holding open doors for you
I've been checking all the seconds and I reckon that you owe a few

Or have you had enough of me adding up all of the curiousness of this stuff
Or is it sinking in?

So is this the end
And all our hours really spent
Or have we the time
To simply retire and try again

It's all about you giving in to being driven where I'll get you to
Enjoying the hours, the mins and the secs too

You never said that it was coming to this


12 – Goodbye From The Okay Chorale.
And it’s time to go.
Goodbye.

 

 


 

Album Notes

 


Uglifruit is: songs, playing, singing, programming, recording &c. by Andy Jenkinson.
‘Presents’ is creative commons licensed.  Feel free to copy and distribute it. 
If you like the album so much that you wish to reply with a present of your own, then visit www.butterflypolite.com/uglifruit for details of how to donate, or buy the album on CD.
 


Written and recorded in February 2009, as part of the RPM challenge (www.rpmchallenge.com)
Uglifruit plays Sarah’s guitar, Stylophone™ and Mr Do!


www.butterflypolite.com/uglifruit
www.myspace.com/andyuglifruit
contact:  uglifruit@butterflypolite.com

 


 

Director’s commentary.


01 – My Prayer.  Written and recorded 16th Feb.
Paying homage to ‘Our Prayer’, the opening of SMiLE – the Beach Boy’s album that never was.  An extended version of this song appears on ‘28 seconds later’, an album on which each song is exactly 28 seconds long.


02 – Falling Down Again.  Written 17th/18th Feb.  Recorded 17th/18th/19th Feb.
A slightly schizophrenic pop song, with a vocal section that also betrays me wanting to be a Beach Boy.  Worryingly there is actually a red sticky trickle that seeps from my ear.


03 – Meteorites.  Written 2nd/3rd Feb.  Recorded 3rd Feb.
Inspired by the film ‘Stardust’ where our hero meets a (literal) fallen star.  The painful low vocals were particularly fun, and their emotional cracking was acting rather than the fact I’d been singing for eight hours straight.  Honest.


04 – Machiavellian Ways.  Written 5th Feb.  Recorded 5th/9th Feb.
Mark Morriss has written some really witty triple rhymes in a slightly country fashion, and I wanted to try it too.  Although I am not sure if I succeeded, I had fun - and got to record handclaps.


05 – Officer’s Mess (March).  Written and recorded 2nd Feb.
This is as close to beat-boxing as I am able to do.  I can only apologise for the smutty pun.


06 – Lullaby.  Written and recorded 14th Feb.
A song for the sleeping.


07 – What’s ‘Round Here? (A Mystery).  Written and recorded 22nd Feb.
A mystery.


08 – Feeling Confuzzzed.  Written 19th/20th Feb.  Recorded 20th Feb.
Come on Wembley, let’s see those hands in the air.  As poppy as they come, including plenty of la la las to sing along with.  I was very pleased with my Harrison-style slide guitar part ... but did he ever have to use a torch because he couldn’t find a slide? 


09 – Carry On Crying.  Written and recorded on 12th/17th Feb.
A 5/4 romp starring Sid James and Hattie Jacques.  Godley and Creme will direct the video.


10 – Strictly Rehearsed.  Written 13th Feb.  Recorded 13th/14th Feb. 
More upbeat shenanigans, this time attacking someone’s who’s off the cuff remarks are pre-prepared (and written as crib notes on their cuffs).


11 – Eventually (Pop Song).  Written and recorded 1st Feb.
A joyous celebration of the lie ‘Ladies First’.  Honestly - this is pure filth, start to finish.  Cover your ears.


12 – Goodbye From The Okay Chorale.  Written and recorded 22nd Feb.
‘Til next time.
 

 

Uglifruit is the alter-ego of Andy Jenkinson

Contact Andy at uglifruit@butterflypolite.com


 

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